Blog: Be happy, be a nice wife

Well, when My Darling sent me this link by email today I just cringed.

With the wedding fast approaching I’ve been a tiny bit bridezilla and my poor Darling has been copping the brunt of it! And this was the final straw!!

I refused to read it until he virtually forced me to tonight (after he gave me a very thoughtful and relaxing shoulder massage). And it helped me chill even more, after a good laugh.

Wendyl Nissen: Doing nice things for hubby makes me happy

9:50 AM Friday Feb 7, 2014

Being happy in a marriage is something we all strive for. And those of us who have been married a while know that the couple who say they have never had a fight, never said a bad word to each other or disagreed on anything are either lying or have a serious non-communication issue.

My year of being a supportive wife has changed many things about me, the biggest being that I now enjoy being kind.

Doing nice things for my husband makes me happy.

Which is why I stumbled across The Happy Wives Club. It’s a bestselling book by an ecstatically happy wife called Fawn Weaver.

In the book she recommends that not only should wives be supportive but they should also get it over with and bloody well surrender.

To maintain a happy marriage, you have to write down every day the things for which you are grateful to your husband.

And the kicker is – they have to be different every day. If you do this apparently you’ll be really happy in a matter of days.

I tried doing it this morning and came up with four things, including the fact that he makes me cups of tea.

I’ll be struggling not to repeat myself tomorrow. Apparently if this happens you can write a list of all the things you are grateful your husband is not such as short, fat, repetitive, selfish, a bad kisser etc.

Another thing you must do is kiss your husband on the mouth, with tongues, a lot. And you must not have any friends of the opposite sex, so he never has to wonder if you are having an affair with them.

You must also write down all the things that drive you nuts about your husband and throw them away, forgetting them and getting over it.

And you must not talk negatively to your friends about your marriage.

I may be a supportive wife, but I can do none of these things.

For a start I don’t have time in the mornings to take myself off with my cute Happy Wives notebook and pen, sit in the sun with a latte and doodle sweet nothings about my husband.

Nor do I have time to think about short, fat, selfish men.

I like to kiss my husband but I’m not sure I want to do it every five minutes, breaking into his and my work routine for a quick pash or stopping in the middle of the supermarket for a good tonguing.

My children would not tolerate it for a start – public displays of affection between parents are yuck. (I notice Fawn Weaver doesn’t have any children.)

I would not be willing to give up my male friends either, for one simple word – trust. If your husband sits at home fretting and chewing his fingernails every time you have lunch with a male friend because he’s worried you have whipped off to a motel for a quick hook-up, then there are bigger problems in your marriage.

Having lunch with a man who is not your husband is an important demonstration of trust in a marriage for both of you.

By eliminating my men friends, I’m basically saying to my husband, “You’re right, I’m a cheating whore underneath it all who can’t wait to get into other men’s pants. Best I put temptation out of the way.”

As for the things that drive me nuts about my husband, I am not letting those go.

For a start, they are the root of a lot of humour in my home, and when he asks me if everything’s all right you need to have something to talk about.

And I will talk to my friends in a negative way about my marriage. I have one friend I tell everything to, and without her I would have no way to work through the little hiccoughs that every marriage encounters, however minor.

Sometimes I see her suppressing the urge to laugh out loud at my murmurings, they are so trivial. She knows it and I know it but we talk about it and I feel better. And most of the time she takes my husband’s side which is good for me. She loves us both, she can put it all in perspective.

So while I’m a very happy, supportive wife, there’ll be no Happy Wives Club for me.

– NZ Herald

Weddings – anything can happen

Our lovely celebrant gave us this great reminder! I’m a control freak so it’s handy to keep in mind!

Weddings are alot like any other occasion in life – anything can happen.
The great banana peel of existence is always on the floor, somewhere. Not only that – anything might go right.
Sometimes the unexpected is an unforgettable moment that transforms a wedding into a memorable experience. The sweetest memories are seldom the results of planning.
Forget fashion shows. Forget a performance. Forget perfection.
Whatever happens gets acknowledged and included.
Whatever happens – we work it in.

Remember, nothing can ruin a wedding if the heart is right and nothing can help a wedding if it’s a military drill.
So relax. Be here. Notice each other. You could walk through fire together.

Robert Fulgham, extract from the book ‘From Beginning to End’
http://robertfulghum.com/index.php/fulghumweb/booksentry/from_beginning_to_end/

Summer luvin…

Classic! Hope you’re getting some summer luvin!

Happy New Year!!!!

Afterglow

My Darling keeps playing this song – it’s all over MTV right now – and Darling seems to love the female vocalists voice.

I don’t really love the tone of the vocals and I think my favourite thing about this song is actually the video. Very clever.

Then My Darling researched the vocalist and she looks very cute and it turns out she was a Voice UK contestant.

So, now just because of that personal story of triumph I quite like the whole package.

Check this audition out.

Wedding Crashers

This movie was on tv last night – I forgot how hilarious it is in a mindless sort of way. You have to love it!

Where to go on honeymoon

Where did you spend your honeymoon?

What a tricky choice – out of all the beautiful, exotic, charming, picturesque places in the world – where did we want to spend our honeymoon?

First of all – my perfect holiday is a tropical island getaway where I can laze all day in the sunshine sipping cocktails and then retreating into a hammock for a siesta. Any excuse. After all the madness of co-ordinating a wedding it was going to be a well deserved break – wherever we went.

Bora Bora, Tahiti seemed like the most idyllic spot, complete with over-water bungalow. But really, is there any point going to Bora Bora when it’s summertime here in NZ? So, we decided Tahiti was the place, but we would save it for a mid winter break.

We would stay in NZ and find a remote little secluded spot and chill there for a week. We have found what we think is heaven, but one place that kept popping up was here:

Driftwood – they have the cutest baches, beach huts and caravans! Sadly the baches were all booked out, and Steve was not staying in a beach hut and is too tall for a caravan. But they are cute and we will get there one day.

And that site is where I found the gorgeous words above. And I think that sums it all up – as long as you have a place where you can stargaze you’re going to be a happy camper!

Wearing a bikini to your wedding: Inappropriate or genius?

Question: Would you get married in nothing but a skin-baring bikini?

Seriously!

While many brides (and probably most of their wedding guests) may find the idea tacky and unbecoming for the big day, a few designers are banking on the fact that some women might say “I do” to a wedding ensemble you can also swim laps in. Designer Mara Hoffman recently trotted out a draped, crystal-studded maillot meant for getting hitched in, and swimwear model Chrissy Teigen (a new bride herself) has created a collection of bridal bikinis she’s dubbed Beach Bunny Bride (although she didn’t wear one of her creations when she married singer John Legend!). According to Heather Hall, fashion and beauty reporter for wedding website The Knot, though the rules of bridal fashion are loosening — pink is the new white, apparently, and bare midriffs were in at the last bridal fashion week — bridal bikinis aren’t about to become mainstream. “Not yet, anyway,” says Hall. Since you probably won’t see a bride walk down the aisle in a two-piece at the next wedding you attend, you can see what all the bridal bikini fuss is about here instead. — Charlotte Rudge, Shine Staff

Check out the pics here!

You're never too old to tie the knot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x54-AoyP1Jo

You would have all heard about the couple in Paraguay who recently tied the knot – the groom was 103 years old and his bride was 99!! After 80 years and umpteen grandchildren together they finally had a religious ceremony to celebrate their life together.

So, as ‘old’ a bride as I feel – at least I’m not that old! haha (she does look pretty good for 99 though!)

Check out the video…

Chateau Tongariro | a romantic winter weekend

Me and My Darling’s romantic winter weekend away wasn’t spent entirely at the Chateau – our nights stay was just one of My Darling’s 40th birthday extravaganza treats!

In the remote wilds of Tongariro National Park, in the middle of the North Island of New Zealand, is an indulgent haven of old world hotel opulence which you should experience once in your lifetime – the Chateau.

It’s been 20 years since I was last nearby – having tramped (hiked) 3 days on the Tongariro Crossing (through the most beautifully unique scenery you can imagine), lugging a heavy backpack, camping in the most basic manner and braving pelting rain on the last day – it looked like an oasis to me and I imagined slipping into a hot bath in a sumptuous suite recovering from the physical exertion. But it wasn’t to be…

Until now.

Usually in winter the grounds leading up to the Chateau are blanketed in snow, but we’ve had such a warm winter so it wasn’t such a winter wonderland, but was still every bit majestic with the sweeping entrance leading to the grand portico and main entrance. Built in 1929, the building has been maintained true to it’s original glamour – chandeliers, velvet drapes, plush furnishings. See for yourself.

With warm welcomes from staff, roaring fires and a generous room with a bathtub to soak away those aches from a day on the slopes, it was the most enjoyable hotel stay we’ve had. The nicest touch which really set the scene for me though was the background music – 1920s and 30s tunes. The romanticism was lost on My Darling, but for a brief moment we were transported onto a set of Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby.

I just needed a few more glasses of bubbles!

Mini Weddings 🩷 Celebrant 🩷 Elopements